Month: January 2017

Recovery is solely the addict’s responsibility


When life becomes difficult, people have a tendency to look for something or someone to blame. When a family is faced with addiction, the need to blame becomes even more intense. It’s almost as though people feel comfort in projecting their anger about an addiction onto something or someone else. For example, I’ve often heard parents blame their kid’s friends for a developing addiction. I’ve also heard of entire communities bearing the brunt of anger for an addict’s downfall. And while there may be factors that are clearly the root cause of an addiction, the reality is that, while circumstances often come together that allow for an addiction to emerge, recovery is always the addict’s responsibility. NO ONE CAN OWN ANOTHER PERSON’S RECOVERY.

I’ve pissed a lot of people off over the years because I tell them that there’s no way someone can be healthy on someone else’s behalf. Yet…

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Know the Signs

Wow! Very insightful.

Stay Strong, Daily Warrior!

The daily prompt today is Oversight, and it reminded me of a short video I watched before. I actually think I’m a person keen to details, but I was really caught off guard by the ending of this video.

It engages you with a sweet story of two students who meet in school. Upon a closer look, you’ll notice a kid was actually plotting a gun shooting while you were focused on someone else.

The video was made by the Sandy Hook Promise, which is a national non-profit organization founded and led by several family members whose loved ones were killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School on December 14, 2012. (Source)

They are delivering a very powerful message through this video and their website which states:

“People who are at-risk of hurting themselves or others often show signs and signals before an act of violence takes place.  When you…

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3 Indicators of Recovery Readiness

God bless this blogger!

People often wonder when the addicts in their life “really mean it” when they say they’re ready to change. All too often, addicts have a tendency to pull the proverbial rug out from under their loved ones through promises to change that are seldom kept. I do believe, however, that all people are capable of positive growth and that when someone is ready to really move forward in a healthy way, that person exhibits various thoughts/behaviors that do indicate that they “really mean it” when they say they’re changing. Three (3) of those thoughts/behaviors that I’ve observed in people who are growing towards health are: 1) A sense of gratitude for the “blessings” in life; 2) Genuine humility expressed through understanding that everyone has their own challenges and that no one is perfect; and, 3) And a deep and real sense of forgiveness, both of self and of others who…

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Are parents to blame for their kid’s addiction?

This message by a fellow bloggers came right on time!

As both a parent and an Addiction Treatment provider, I totally understand how hard people blame their kids’ addiction on themselves.  When our kids go down unhealthy paths, it’s really easy to convince ourselves that it’s our fault and that we’ve failed as parents when our kids become addicted to drugs and alcohol.  But the truth is that every single person on the planet is responsible for themselves and, especially in America, we have choices, even if limited by circumstances, to choose the paths we follow.

The reality is that individual psychologies are layered and complex.  There’s so much about those psychologies that are formed by people, places, and genetics that there’s no way ANYONE is responsible for ANYONE else’s path.  Because each personality exists ONLY in a respective mind, no one can account for another’s mental constructs and perceptions.  That being said, I know…

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Just A Little More Faith

Maybe if you’re like me, sometime in your life you have been broken. Maybe by a horrible break up, mental illness, cancer, or depression. Life just felt you broken. But the amazing about our God is He wants to come to us with our brokenness. “Come to me all who are weak and burdened and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28
With God you don’t have to be fake. He knows your heart, your trials, and everything you are feeling. So when you come to Him (which you need to because He is always there to help and love you) you don’t have to put on a face, just be real with Him. Hand Him all your worries, troubles, and brokenness. And He can give you rest, love, comfort, grace, and pick. He knows your mistakes and your failures. He loves you no matter what. Come to Him…

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Press On


These last few weeks have been very trying for me and my family, dealing with my son’s addiction and daily life. I know that I have gotten through it because of God’s grace and mercy. I will not sit here and lie to you. There were days, and I’m sure more to come, where I was mad and didn’t want to talk to Him. He was there though. He would give me a nudge, showing me that He was there. Saturday was by far the worst day I think. I did not leave my house. I did housework and ignored Him, but He’d send others to push and pull me along. I felt bad afterward, of course, and I finally said, “Ok God, I hear you, but right now I don’t want to talk to you because I’m in my feelings and don’t want to say anything I will regret.” You know, because we tell our kids, best to keep quiet if you’re not going to say anything nice. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t mad AT Him, I was just mad in general. I know what my son is going through is not by His doing. However, I do know, He allows these struggles because my son has a calling on His life. The greater the calling, the more difficult the struggle? Yea, something like that. Anyway, I was saying and thinking, “Why God? Just please keep him safe and don’t leave him.” I know my son is hurting and probably needs his momma’s hugs but I feel it in my spirit that this is not the time. God, well, God is trying to teach a lesson. The problem is, I don’t think my son is paying attention. As much as I share the Word with him, I don’t think he gets it. He wants the easy way out, he wants for momma to fix it, but I can’t fix this. And it hurts like hell to not be able to help him. He has to want to help himself. I can now see what we put God through when we turn our backs on him and live in the ways of the world. It tears Him apart, as I am torn for my son. I know He is torn for him too. But we have to reach out to Him. He’s there and always will be, but He will not force Himself on us. No, He will never do that. He waits patiently for us to turn to Him. I am waiting for my son to say, “I’m done Ma, I’m tired.” I won’t say I’m waiting patiently, because I’m not patient. I want my son to be healed now but I know it’s in His timing, not mine. So I hold on to His promises. I hold on because He doesn’t lie. He showed me once, not so long ago, the chains being broken for my son. He wouldn’t have shown me that if it weren’t true.

So, as Paul says in Philippians 4:13-14, Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Some days are harder than others, but I will fight the good fight and keep praying to Him to heal my son. I know it is coming. I just have to hold on and keep the faith and press on toward the goal for myself, and for my son…and of course my other 2 children.

If you’re going through some type of struggle tonight, I know what you’re feeling. Don’t give up, don’t throw in the towel. All of our struggle will make sense to us in the end. We may even look back and laugh at all this pain. Because painful it is, but I know I can count on my Father, to be faithful and loving. Keep the faith!

God Bless you!



In mother Mary you will find no mediator, Elephant headed 8 armed god is no savior, stone Buddha is deaf to your prayers, chukras cannot redeem your lost soul, the river ganges cannot wash away your sin, burning incense at a temple or humming sacred chants cross leggard are all in vain, in trying to perfectly follow the torah you will only find that the letter kills, saints and rosery have no actual blessings, neither can shouting allah akbar open the gates of heaven, no no No!!
Let this be loud and clear – your true hope is found in one alone –> JESUS said “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” (John 14, 7). John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish…

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